A summer fling from my past is in town for work this week. We met towards the end of last year while we were both on a business trip, stayed in touch and linked up several weeks later when he was in my city for work for an entire week.
I don’t typically entertain, “flings”, but this guy seemed nice, really interested in me and I was really bored of my dating life and wanted a “no strings attached” sort of situation.
We “enjoyed each other’s company” for seven entire days, then he flew back to his city. I tentatively made plans to visit him, but kept postponing, until I eventually never went.
Fastforward to an entire year later with us–him, attempting to pick up where we left off.
Except not. In my mind the entire thing was a fling and I purposely never really grew attached to him because realistically we live over 20 hours away from each other and we’re too different in our day to day lives to make a relationship work. So naturally, I just let it fizzle out. I stopped regularly texting, calling and moved on with life.
We went out bar hoping, but everything just felt really off. I couldn’t put my finger on it, but I just wasn’t into the evening’s festivities. It seemed juvenile. I had just gotten finished pulling a 70 hour work week. I didn’t want to have to shout in order to have a conversation with him. It all kind of annoyed me actually. Ever since I hit 30, I’m just not really into night life. I lost count on how many bars we went to, but of course he was absolutely TRASHED by the time last call was announced.
We ended the night back at his hotel, but mostly because I was too tired to finish driving home. I figured we could just casually sleep off our beers and I’d ease out in the morning, but no.
He kept going on about how it had been “an entire year” and so forth and so on. I finally had to shut the shitshow down and keep it real with him and let him know it wasn’t going to go down. He reluctantly accepted, but there was a bit of awkwardness in the air, even through this morning when we went out for breakfast.
A lot has changed for me in a year and I can’t find it in me to waste a lot of energy on someone I can’t see a legitimate future with. I don’t want to be someone’s business trip hook up nor do I want to think of anyone in that way. I want something with actual substance. I’m a lot better than that and I deserve a lot better than that and maybe I let my inhibitions go last year because I wasn’t respecting myself.
Anyway, he’s in town through the middle of this week and I told him we could possibly meet for dinner or something after work, but I think I’m going to refrain from any activities that involve going back to someone’s dwelling.