So it’s no “surprise” that I wasn’t really looking forward to valentine’s day this year. I’ve been doing pretty well emotionally lately, but yesterday my mind was swimming with thoughts of my ex. Not necessarily sad thoughts, but thoughts nonetheless. Luckily, I had an extremely hectic day at work, so I didn’t have a lot of time to sulk or dwell on it. Hopefully he had a good day with whatever it is that he did or didn’t do.
After the craziness of work yesterday (including the departure of a good work friend–it was her last day!), I met up with some friends for dinner. As I mentioned earlier, I wasn’t sure if I was going to do anything for valentine’s day, but something told me to stop being a grouch and go out anyway. What’s the worst that could happen? I was having dinner with a group full of people, who like me, were single too. Why not enjoy each other’s company?
A good friend of mine coordinated this dinner of the lonely heart’s club. I didn’t realize until I got there, that he had invited a person or three that I hadn’t met before. While I wasn’t in the mood to “pep up the perk” with the new people, I sucked it up anyway and gave it a go. I sat right next to one friend of his and introduced myself. Turns out that was the best thing I could have done that entire night.
The friend (he was a guy) and I hit it off immediately and started to talk like we had known each other for years. He seemed to be very friendly and genuine. He looked really sharp in his work attire–a navy sport coat, tailored dark gray pants and brown dress shoes (similar to the outfit below):
I was immediately drawn to him by all of his travel stories. He had recently gotten back from India and told me about all the amazing things he experienced there. He also mentioned having pretty much gone to every Asian and European country over the course of ten years with the goal of traveling as much as he can while he’s “young”. Some travel was for business and some was for pleasure. While talking about his travels, he happened to mention that he was originally from Milwaukee, WI…which is where my ex is from, ha.
(In reference to the meme above, Check out the manitowoc minute here)
I pretended to not have been told “everything I’ve ever wanted to know about the city of Milwaukee, Wisconsin the state (in general), The Packers and “Da’ Rodgers” ” prior and let him explain his hometown to me in his own words. Luckily, he had a different perspective of Milwaukee, so it was like hearing about it for the first time (no, he does not have a Wisconsin accent and neither did my ex, unless he was frustrated and then he did and it was funny–but that’s irrelevant to this story). He even told me about this “speakeasy” place I should checkout if I ever go there.
After dinner, everyone seemed pretty tired and called it a night. It was pushing closer to 9 and after a long workday, that made sense, but tailored suit guy asked if I wanted to join him to walk a few doors down to a chocolate shop. I had nothing else better to do, so why not?
“After all, it’s valentine’s day…what’s valentine’s day without chocolate?,” so off we went to grab chocolate.
We managed to snag some truffles about ten minutes before the shop closed and we were booted out at which point he asked if I wanted to grab a drink some place. Through conversation, we realized that we lived about ten minutes from each other on the other side of town. He suggested we meet at this cozy dive bar on our side of town to continue the evening, so off we went.
After meeting up at the dive bar, we spoke another two hours or so about traveling, our jobs, our friends, our random adventures, how terrible hitting 30 felt, how difficult it can be to make friends at this age and so on. We even found out we share a birthday week. He told me some funny stories about how he and his friends bought a sailboat one year with the plan to sail around for a week, but none of them knew how to sail and the boat sank within the first six hours they were on it (no one died).
The conversation was so fascinating and the more we spoke, the more I wanted to know about this guy. It was so interesting. He kept me on the edge of my seat the entire night, but just as equally seemed interested in my life stories as well. Not only was he interesting, he was very kind, patient, non-judgemental and down to earth. I felt like I speaking to someone I’ve known all my life.
Our night came to an end around midnight when we both realized that we had “grown up jobs” and needed to get to bed. We exchanged numbers and made our newly cemented friendship, “facebook official”.
I couldn’t help but to smile on the way home because of the social interaction. I haven’t had such a great and engaging social interaction like that in months and I’ve been longing for that level of connection for some time. While I’ve been dating here and there, I’ve realized lately that there’s something missing…and it’s this spark of being engulfed in engaging conversation to the point of losing track of time (and reality). The guys are nice (and some are fun), but just not extremely interesting conversation wise. I haven’t felt this same level of excitement in speaking to someone since I met my ex. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve met so many people over the past few months (friends, flings, otherwise, etc) that have held my attention (and have even been fun), but maybe not to this extent. The funny thing is, I’m not even holding this guy in a romantic light in anyway shape or form. He’s so damn cool that I just want to be his friend. Sometimes it’s just cool to have someone to vibe with platonically and I feel like he’s someone I could hangout with and could always guarantee a good time.
Since last night we’ve spoken back and forth today about how we both had a great night last night. I’m even inviting him to my birthday dinner in two weeks and he’s invited me to his later on the same week.
So no, while I didn’t get to skip around last night , hand in hand with a “bae”, I did make a new friend and that to me was a nice way to end such a potentially shitty day.