A Self-Diagnosis is Stupid.

For the better part of a month or so, I’ve had some pretty intense cramps, indigestion, nausea, dizziness, headaches, mood swings and unexplainable fatigue (like going to bed at 7 p.m., exhaustion). I’ve mostly ignored it for the past few weeks because well, you know, been a little occupied being depressed.

Anyway, I googled these symptoms and stumbled upon some articles that said, “could you be pregnant? Here are the common symptoms” Tell me why I pretty much had every single symptom. Bitch, nah.

nope - prince with monkey

Pause.

First of all, I don’t even want to entertain this. I’m tired (mentally, physically and especially emotionally). And secondly, no. These symptoms are probably all separate of each other. Like maybe I’ve had these weird unsettling feelings with my stomach because I keep taking my medication without eating, and maybe I have indigestion because I’m eating really fast and inhaling a lot of air….maybe I’ve been nauseous because I’m eating really shitty (holiday) food (that I’m craving) this time of year, perhaps the dizziness and headaches are from stress, the and the moodiness and fatigue from being depressed/anxious. Yeah, that’s it.

Even so, the chance of that happening with a(n) (ex) partner who is (intentional medically) “sterile” are like 1-2% at best. Yeah, I’m going to go with, “NO for 500, Alex“.

Anyway, I typed all of that ridiculousness to basically insinuate attempting to diagnose yourself will leave you thinking that you have cancer, are pregnant or dying. 9 times out of 10, you’re probably ok and your mind is doing backflips into the pool of “assumptions” and “what ifs”.

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Hate.

I’m exhausted living in the here and now. People have become so hateful towards one another or perhaps people are just more vocal about it through social media and television. ¬†While I’m not perfect, I have tried to always live by the golden rule,

Do unto others and you would have them undo to you

Such a simple phrase that I would hear growing up as a child, has now become so foreign. I don’t understand how people can be so hateful towards each other, especially towards people they may not know on a personal level. How can you hate someone you don’t even know?

I can admit to not favoring many things in life, but it’s difficult for me to wrap my head around sincerely “hating” anyone to their absolute core.

These are some sad times we live in, man.